How Soon We Forgive

Dogs can have a profound effect on our emotional state. Usually, it is positive. They make us smile when we come home, they make us laugh with their silly antics. They are comforting when we are down and soothing while we relax. When bad things happen to our dogs, we naturally worry or cry. The loss of a dog can take a terrible toll on us. But how often have you noticed a dog making you feel hurt or jealous? Sounds a little strange doesn’t it? But it is true. Even though they have no way to knowingly cause these feelings and we really shouldn’t take their actions to heart, we sometimes do. In my current puppy class, there is a Havanese pup that is home with “Mom” all day and “Dad “works. There is a strong bond between Puppy and Mom that is actually interfering with Dad’s ability to form a bond. He tries to act tough, but you can tell it is hurting his feelings a little. Mom had to work the dog most of the class, but Dad still carried the little girl out, snuggling her against him.

Recently, Bailey spent the weekend with his breeders, a mother and daughter, at a conformation show that we were unable to attend. Brittany, the daughter, is Bailey’s handler at all conformation shows. She has a special relationship with Bailey; she was around for his entire singleton puppyhood and now gets to see him with some regularity because of shows. After the three day weekend, Brittany brought him home and he was his usual wild self, not even calming down to say good bye to Brittany. She tried so hard to get his attention and have him be still just for a minute and he would not. Finally, she said “fine, jerk”. I could tell that it hurt her feelings just a little that she could not get the attention she wanted from him. I too felt bad because I would (and have) feel that same way if I wanted his attention but he was more excited about something else. (Like how he completely forgets I exist the second he gets to doggy daycare and then refuses to leave after an entire day). Bailey has no idea what he is doing; he is just living in his happy moment, being a dog. But we emotional humans feel it inside, even though rationally, we know we should not. Like a good dog, we do not stay upset for long. As Brittany turns to leave “the jerk” still bouncing around the yard, she calls behind her in the usual sweet voice reserved for him, “I love you”.